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Ms A 41r

[41r°] to speak about Him, for there is so much self-love intermingled with spiritual conversations! Ah! it was really for the Blessed Virgin alone that I was coming to the Abbey. Sometimes I felt alone, very much alone, and as in the days of my life as a day boarder when I walked [5] sad and sick in the big yard, I repeated these words that always gave rise to a new peace and strength in my heart: “Life is your barque not your home!” When very little, these words gave me courage, and even now, in spite of the years which have put to flight so many impressions of childish piety, the image of the barque still charms [10] my soul and helps it put up with its exile. Doesn’t Wisdom say: “Life is like a ship that plows the restless waves and leaves after it no trace of its rapid passage”? When I think of these things, my soul is plunged into infinity, and it seems to me it already touches the eternal shore. I seem to be receiving the [15] embraces of Jesus. I believe I see my heavenly Mother coming to meet me with Papa, Mama, the four little angels. I believe I am enjoying forever a real and eternal family reunion.

Before seeing my family reunited around the Paternal hearth of heaven, however, I [20] was to pass through many separations; the year, for instance, when I was received as a child of the Blessed Virgin, she took from me my dear Marie, the only support of my soul. It was Marie who guided, consoled, and aided me in the practice of virtue; she was my sole oracle. Pauline, no doubt, had remained well ahead in my heart, but Pauline was far, very far from me! I had suffered martyrdom getting accustomed to living without her, to seeing between me and her



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