Last conversations with Marie of the Sacred Heart - August 1897

August 1, 1897

"I don't know what I'll do to die. . . . Ah! I am abandoned. As God wills!"

August 10.

I was saying to her: "I asked God not to let you suffer very much, and you are suffering so much!"

"I begged God not to hear the prayers which would place an ob­stacle in the accomplishment of His designs for me, and that He remove all the difficulties opposed to these designs."

August 11.

I was telling her: "I won't be able to confide in Mother Agnes of Jesus. "

"It wouldn't be necessary except in the event that she needed some consolation. In your case, you would never have to speak to her for your own consolation as long as she'll not be Prioress. I assure you, this is always what I did. Thus, Mother Prioress gave her permission to talk to me, but I didn't talk to her, and I said nothing to her about my soul. I find that it's this that makes the religious life a martyrdom. Without this, it would be an easy life and without any merits."

August 15.

1. On August 13, before Communion, she was particularly moved when listening to the whole community recite the "Confiteor."

"When I was listening to all the Sisters say for me: 'I confess to God, the Father Almightly, to the Blessed Virgin Mary, and to all the saints,' I was thinking: Oh! yes, they do well to beg pardon from all the saints. I can't tell you how I felt then. This is how God makes me feel that I am little. It makes me so happy!"

2.    I was saying: "What grieves me is that you're still going to suffer very much. "

"It doesn't bother me, because God will give me the courage I need."

3.    We were saying: "If God were to take her tonight, she would go without our being aware of it; what pain we would experience!"

"Ah! I find this would be very charming on His part; He would be stealing me!"


August 20.

"This isn't like persons who suffer from the past or the future; I myself suffer only at each present moment. So it's not any great thing."

August 22.

"People don't know what it is to suffer this way. No! they would have to feel it."

After this same day of continual sufferings:

"See how good God is! Today, I didn't have the strength to cough, and I hardly coughed at all. Now that I'm a little better, the coughing is about to begin."


August 27.

I said: "Do you want some cold water?" "Oh! I'm dying to have some!"

"Mother Prioress has told you to ask for what you need; do it out of obedience. "

"I do ask for what I need." "Not for what gives you pleasure?"

"No, only what I need. Thus, when I don't have any grapes, I don't ask for any."

A short time after she had taken a drink of water, she was looking at her glass, and I said: "Drink a little. " "No, my tongue isn't dry."

"When I think that sick as you are you still find ways to mortify yourself. "

"What do you expect? If I listened to myself I would be drinking too often."

© Washington Province of Discalced Carmelite Friars, Inc


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