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From sr Francoise-Therese (Leonie) to her three sisters in the Carmel - March 31, 1918

From sr Francoise-Therese (Leonie) to her three sisters in the Carmel - March 31, 1918

Holy Day of Easter 1918 [31st March]

Quickly, give me your news, darling little sisters! How has your rigorous lent been? It must have been particularly arduous for you due to your diet of bread, your only nourishment in the evening. Knowing you are deprived of the things most necessary to life pains me exceedingly. How I’d love to be able to at least give you my share! But 300 grams won’t go far . . . . For six weeks now I haven’t eaten any meat at all. I’ve been put on a very strict diet, eating only rice pudding or rice broth and various purées with egg yolks. I’m almost a Carmelite when it comes to my diet, whereas in terms of the care and treats I’m given, I’m living like a princess, having everything in abundance despite the war. Our darling Mother is being ever so thoughtful to me. – Here, in a few words, is the reason for all these peculiarities. About a year ago, I began having pains in my intestines and vomiting as if I had food poisoning. It happens more frequently now, recurring every week.

I consider this as a sign that Jesus is at the door and, like darling Thérèse, I cry out to Him, “I’m here! I’m here!” Yes, may I fall as soon as possible into His divine arms, and from there I’ll not move, even to go to purgatory, because He would be obliged to come with me and then it would be heaven. On the first Friday in March, as I was kneeling before the Holy Sacrament, I felt so unwell that I thought I might die at His feet, and I said to myself, “How sweet that would be!” Yes, it would be too sweet and too wonderful to leave exile in that way. In any case, it’s as Jesus pleases . . . His chosen time will be the best time. I only want what my adored Eagle wants. He is preparing to swoop upon His insignificant little creature, and she can only become significant in Him and by Him.